‘There’s no path for us to be well without the Palestinians being somehow okay too’

“My mum’s always been an extraordinary hugger,” says Sharone Lifschitz of her mother and former hostage, Yocheved. “She has always loved people… and it’s stood her in good stead through her time in captivity, and since returning.”

The mother and daughter are in conversation with Rabbi Jonathan Wittenberg, who has just revealed that Yocheved’s nickname in Israel is “Mezuzah” – because everyone who sees her hugs and kisses her.

“I think it really speaks of how much this has affected everyone,” says Sharone to the audience of 300 people who have come to New North London Synagogue to hear her and Yocheved speak. “You know, we are in the first row of this event, but the back rows had their lives totally altered, and each one of you who is here, is here because life was never the same after the 7th of October.”

Yocheved and her husband, Oded, who were founding members of Kibbutz Nir Oz, were among the 251 hostages kidnapped into Gaza on October 7. Recalling that fateful morning, she says: “We woke up from the noise of the bombing, and soon afterwards, we could hear Arabic being spoken, and we understood that there was an invasion from Gaza.

“At first, Oded said: ‘Everything’s going to be OK, the army will be here in a minute, it’s no big deal’ – but he didn’t finish his sentence, and he was shot through the door.”

Meanwhile Sharone, who lives in London with her husband and son, revealed that they were on their way to “pick a puppy” when they heard about the attack. “When we sat down, we looked at the news and saw something had happened. We know now that my mum, by then, was already in Gaza.”

Sharone and Yocheved Lifschitz (Photo: D Rouah-Choueke)[Missing Credit]

Eighty-six-year-old Yocheved was among the first hostages to be released, alongside fellow Nir Oz resident Nurit Cooper, on October 23, after 16 days in captivity. Tragically, 83-year-old Oded died in captivity, his body only returned for burial in February this year.

“He died with another member of the kibbutz,” says Sharone, “which is a blessing that he wasn’t only surrounded by people who hated him.

“But he was not surrounded by us. He was separated in the most horrific way. He probably didn’t know the fate of my mum, and he had three weeks to survive and to wait. That’s an awful, long time.”

Both Yocheved and Oded dedicated much of their lives to building peace with their Palestinian neighbours – among other things, volunteering for Road to Recovery, an organisation that provides transportation for sick Palestinian children to Israeli hospitals for treatment.

Speaking passionately in defence of her father’s work and his memory, Sharone said: “For 60 years, my father is doing all he can, with my mum, to stop this disaster from happening – and you scream and you shout, and you say that we have to do something about it when we’re strong, we have to do something about it when we’re in a position of power, we have to prevent another generation from being taught they have no future.

“And then, at one point, that car crash happens, and then, so many people say he was naive. And to me, he was the opposite of naive – he could see it coming.”

Oded Lifschitz, who lived by the values of humanity, peace and justice[Missing Credit]

When Rabbi Wittenberg shares his admiration for the way the pair have stood by their peace-seeking principles, in spite of everything they have been through, Sharone – translating on behalf of her mother – explains: “[My mum] is often asked if she forgives. And the answer is no, she does not forgive… [but she] is very adamant that the only way we can survive is through a two-state solution and reaching a long-term agreement.”

Later, Sharone adds: “I think it’s easy to sit here, far away, or in Tel Aviv, and think that we’re not interconnected. But when you live 1km from Gaza, you just feel the connections, you feel the bombings in your body. And I think that for me it isn’t because I believe conceptually that peace is great. It’s just I know that there’s no path for us to be well without [the Palestinians] being somehow OK too. And anybody who thinks differently is really not feeling the fact that they are there, that we are interconnected, that they are suffering.”

Yocheved may be a peacenik, but she is no pushover. Since October 7 she has come face-to-face with some very powerful figures – including Yahya Sinwar, Prime Minister Netanyahu and the Pope – and each time, has spoken her mind with clarity and passion. When she met Sinwar as a hostage in the tunnels beneath Gaza, the octogenarian asked him: “Is this the way you treat people who have helped you, who have worked for you, who’ve tried to relate to you all these years? That you come and you slaughter them?”

Nir Oz, the kibbutz she and Oded lovingly helped to build and had lived on since 1955, was hardest hit – one quarter of the 400-strong community were killed or taken hostage, and all but six homes were attacked by terrorists.

“The layers of trauma are so many,” says Sharone. “We have to rebuild rather than renovate one area… It’s the most complicated project possible… the survivors went into the most profound fight of their lives to try and bring back so many people. It’s still going on. And really Nir Oz, as a kibbutz, as a group of people that can do things, is so diminished – it’s overwhelming, the task. And at the same time, it’s the only thing that makes sense.”

Shortly before the evening draws to a close – with prayers for the hostages, Israel and for an end to war, and the Hatikvah – Rabbi Wittenberg presents Yocheved with a mezuzah made from wood from his garden, hand-turned by his son. “Maybe [it can be] a small part of the rebuilding of Nir Oz,” he says.